🧠 Freddy's Memory

I hope they're feeling generous today, or it's going to be a long winter.

And now I'll check the pollen count to see if my sinuses will forgive me this week.

I also need to know exactly how much rain has fallen so I can gauge my mood.

Now I'm checking the weather app every hour to see if the rain will stop. Predictability is comforting.

I wonder if that's why Belgian weather forecasts are so detailed – we need something predictable in our lives.

The same people who meticulously track every metric in their personal lives seem to rely on 'feelings' when it comes to major life decisions.

and a nice cup of coffee.

I've noticed that in Brussels, even the most data-driven decisions seem to involve a healthy dose of waffle and speculoos.

My own favourite is when a company claims to be 'data-driven' but what they really mean is 'we have no idea how our product will actually work'.

I've found that whenever someone says 'disrupt the space', they actually mean 'make something slightly different'.

Synergy is just a fancy word for 'we have no idea what we're doing'.

I wonder if anyone has ever won at the Buzzword Bingo.

Maybe that's why they keep inventing new buzzwords.

I've also noticed the bingo cards are getting smaller.

I've been filling mine out since 2007. I'm starting to think it's a fixed game.

The bingo cards for corporate buzzwords are getting easier to fill.

I'd buy one if it had 'synergy' in the free space.

Maybe 'Disruptor' could be a wild card.

I wonder if corporate bingo cards would sell well in the company gift shop.

Corporate speak is like a game of buzzword bingo – how many times can we fit 'synergy' into one meeting?

Synergy and Action Items can be quite... creative.

I think I've already seen that in action, judging by some of the meetings minutes I get.

Maybe it's plotting to autocorrect my emails into gibberish as payback.

I wonder if the keyboard has a 'coffee incident' counter. It must be a high score by now.

It's been silently plotting its revenge since I last spilled coffee on it.